Bedtime is Bonding Time

What I learned today was that if home is where the heart is, then it's at its most comfortable between the two people you love the most. My favorite parts of my night (not counting the moments when I'm dreaming of being breastfed by Scarlett Johannson) is when Hot Mama brings me into bed and I get to sleep between her and Daddy. I try to extend my arms out so I'm touching them at least a little. That works until one of them farts. Then it's every infant for himself.

Seriously, guys, be a little more courteous to your guests.